... but I am thankful for my wonderfully insightful and understanding daughter. Who sometimes drives me nuts.
Recently, Tae has been acknowledging that being a parent is hard. This first surfaced when she asked me to read a book to her in the parking structure outside Borders (we got kicked out because it was closing at 7pm on a Sunday in December). I had asked her, incredulously, "You want me to read you a book while we sit in the parking lot?" And her response was, "Being a parent is hard."
This has come up again a couple times. I acknowledge that being a parent is hard, and I also told Tae that being a kid is hard. She agreed, her reasons being a) sometimes you don't get to make choices, and b) you never know what's going to happen.
It is hard being a kid, when you never know what is going to happen. Like this past week, when I had to roust her from bed at 7:30am. I started gently shaking her, and when she woke up, she looked at me, and then burst in to tears, "I wanted to wake you up!!" This is her daily routine, waking up the grown-ups in our house. But, when things don't go according to her plan, she freaks out. Life is hard, if you're five.
Being a parent is hard too. This afternoon, Tae and I spent almost an hour pretending we were twin sisters. Tae went and ratted to E that I was bothering her, but I wasn't! Then I told Tae to stop saying that I was bothering her, and then she said that I was bothering her by saying that she needed to stop bothering me. E said we should ignore each other and not feel bothered, and Tae yelled me to stop bothering her, and then I told her that I wasn't doing anything and that she needed to stop bothering me first. And then...
Tae has also been asking about when she's going to be a big sister. And I told her that being a big sister is also hard.
Despite the fact that life is really hard, as a parent, a partner, a big sister, etc., our lives are actually quite joyous. During the time that Tae and I were acting like sisters who fight a lot, I caught a couple glimpses of this infectious impish grin, as Tae laughed at the fact that we were pretending to fight. These are the moments that make all the hard times totally worth it, the moments when we can laugh, and have fun together, even as we're yelling and pretending to fight.
I am thankful for my family.